Metaphysical Vagina: Lil’ Kim’s “Hardcore”

In case you forget what “Metaphysical Vagina” is, it’s The Curls’ series of what/where/who-ever we’ve been . You can click on the tag at the bottom of the post and if the internet does its job, you’ll be directed to all the 2 or 3 MVs we’ve done over the past two years. ANYWAY.

As you can see by the title, today’s Metaphysical Vagina from whence I came is an album I was obsessed with at age 19, Lil’ Kim’s “Hardcore.”

Don't google what she looks like now, guys. I'm serious. DON'T.

Don’t google what she looks like now, guys. I’m serious. DON’T.

A few weeks ago, I discovered the tape player in my 1995 Camry works, thanks to my roommate who had been borrowing my car and left a tape in it.  Days later, I’m cleaning the pad when I discover the cassette mixes I had made when I was in college titled “(1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th) Year Oddities.” And hoo boy, the memories young Courtney so astutely had the forethought to save in these aural time capsules.  

One song in particular caught my attention – “Big Momma Thang,” by Lil’ Kim from her Hardcore album from 1997.  The thick, buttery, swirling opening beats and loops underneath Kim’s signature alto Kimmy-from-the-block growl transported my white ass back to when I was a dropped-jaw virgin listening to the filthiest things I had ever heard from a woman’s – or anyone’s – mouth.  And suddenly it all made sense.

Please to read the dirty, filthy, amazing lyrics:

I used to be scared of the dick
Now I throw lips to the shit
Handle it like a real bitch
Heather Hunter, Janet Jack-me
Take it in the butt, yah, yazz wha
I got land in Switzerland, even got sand in the Marylands
Bahamas in the spring, baby, it’s a Big Momma thing
Can’t tell by the diamonds in my rings
That’s how many times I wanna cum, twenty-one
And another one, and another one, and another one
24 carats nigga
That’s when I’m fuckin wit’ the average nigga
Work the shaft, brothers be battin’ me, and oh
Don’tcha like the way I roll
And play wit’ my bushy
Tell me what’s on your mind when your tongue’s in the pussy
Is it marriage 
Baby carriage 
Shit no, on a dime shit is mine
Got to keep ’em comin’ all the time 

Case closed.

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